Thank you for all the messages I have received. Sorry if I have not yet replied, I will definitely get to it. :)
This right here is my jam! I dedicate it to all you fellow working women. If you love your work great! If you don't, maybe this is the push you need to let go and find somethings that you are passionate about. If you are unable to change your job, change your attitude toward it - trust me it will be for your own good.
I have been busy, too busy in my opinion because there has not been time to blog and just relax. Today I made the time, (smiles). In the midst of the busyness, I have found time for little pleasures and treasures.
Books are a passion of mine and I guard my reading time jealously. Lately its been important to read for growth and knowledge as much as I read for pleasure. My books are all chosen carefully for that purpose. Below is a little preview of what I have been reading - I have discovered Bell Hooks and her writing makes me thoughtful and critique things in a way that I never have before. Yvonne Vera's Butterfly Burning is a book that I had to consciously get into because it is written in poetic prose, full of metaphors you have to pay attention, the story is beautiful even though tragic. Irene Sabatini's 'The boy next door,' is enjoyable and although I did not grow up seeing any interracial relationships in Zimbabwe it depicts it in a sensitive and honest manner. I do like books!
2. Chill time (where I can fit it in)
You will often find me sitting in my new favorite cafe with a tea and sometimes a coffee at least once a week, with a good book. Don't you just love their coffee cups. Its only recently that I noticed the words 'cognitive therapy,' written in the design and yes it is like a therapy of sort sitting there and letting your thoughts unfurl and tea relax.
3. Aziza Brahim
Is a Sahrawi singer who I saw in an evening concert at a little obscure but charming church in central London a few weeks back. Through this I learnt about a people I had no idea existed. The Sahrawi's are displaced people of the Western Sahara which is occupied by the Morocco She uses her art(singing) to be an ambassador for her people and to spread awareness of the oppression they endure. Although she resides in Spain, she has continued to champion the cause of her homeland. I am inspired to endure the hard work to get my dreams of coco-butterfly to become reality, to champion for my own people wherever I am. One of my favorite songs from her is Regressio.
4. When the writings on the wall....
I have found comfort in the knowledge that change happens and no situation is unchangeable. Sometimes we are blessed with the ability to see situations with new 'eyes,' or perception through our own searching or through the kindness and time of a kind soul. When the writings on the wall we could all heed it and courageously take action - jump off the cliff so to speak and break out into a new adventure. I'm in the process of figuring out which cliff to jump off and it will be amazing as much as it will be scary.
Let's keep evolving and going toward a vibrant life. Don't give up when the going get's tough, only keep trying and doing and being.
Although change is a constant, happens unobtrusively, as life ticks off its seconds, change that we need to make consciously and deliberately is often hard to effect. Some habits can be so deeply entrenched in lives like poor eating habits, procrastination and being disorganized and changing them seems to need an otherworldly strength and stamina. Excuses abound, and are easier than taking a hard long look in the mirror and taking personal responsibility for the change that needs to happen in us and our lives. We need to be in that cocoon then, straining, striving, becoming stronger in the pain of change, taking a day at a time, but its not for the faint hearted and weary. As I write this I know I want to change my eating habits and am tired of wishing and promising myself tomorrows that may not come and I feel the time is now. Our lives are determined by what we consistently do or don't do and by being the people we need to be daily to achieve our dreams that is what will work better than just wishing and dreaming. What sets men and women like Barack Obama, and Oprah apart from other people? What changes did they have to battle to be where they are today as the kind of people they are? What kind of person will I be and what will I achieve if I start allowing myself to change in the next few months starting now? The struggle is necessary, the pain and darkness is needed too - because without them we may be happy but we wont have the strength and wisdom to go through. A butterfly has to be a caterpillar and must go into that cocoon, it cannot ignore any of the stages because it will either die or will never learn to fly. So first acknowledge that something needs to change and then take a determined stance each day to change that thing whether its an attitude, a behavior a way of communicating with people or a dream. We can't change other people but we certainly can do something about ourselves. Let's keep evolving.
Be prepared, no matter how unmotivated or terrible you feel. Get up, get dressed and be great, act like you know its going to be a good day. Chances are by the end of the day, you will feel better and opportunity will have knocked because you were prepared for it. In life we cannot always rely on feelings. You are golden.
I encountered Nozipo Maraire' s book Zenzele: A Letter for My Daughter on my search for Zimbabwean authors Its been a quietly vivid read, gentle but making a strong imprint on my heart. I a woman whose mother departed this life in my early childhood, so reading it, left me at times imagining what my own mother would have said to me in relation to our Shona culture, decolonization and different customs like lobola. What kind of relationship would we have had? I will never know, however I saw the conflict of a mother having to let go of her daughter as she charts her own path in a foreign land and these words are weighed with love, wisdom and vulnerability from a mother to a daughter. It left me with a question I am still to answer, what does it really mean to be an African woman, both in Africa and in the Western world where culture often meets conflict? You will be the first to know once I know the answer to that multifaceted question.
My favorite quotes:
“There is not a man in the world who is worth your dignity. Do not confuse self-sacrifice with love.”
“You have the ability to create the world that you wish to live in. Nothing is fixed for you.”
''At the end of the day, you will meet only two men in your life: One will make your hands tremble; the other will make them steady. The first will be your passion of youth, but like the blazing fires of the bush, it will soon die to glowing embers, then cool ashes. The second will enter your life quietly, like a thief in the night. he will be like the mighty trees in the forest that we do not see before us, yet they are there, strong and tall; in rain and sun, they dig their roots deep and shade us with their leaves. It is the second one who you must marry. He will be a good husband and father to your children.'' - (This though is my favorite - I felt like she was my own mother talking to me.)